I Gotta Stay Hungry for the Crimson Tide

OPELIKA, Ala. -- The Alabama fan accused of poisoning landmark trees at Auburn's Toomer's Corner was assaulted at a gas station shortly after leaving the courthouse Wednesday, police said.
  Harvey Updyke Jr., 62, told an officer he was attacked when he stepped out of his car at a gas station on Birmingham Highway, according to Opelika Police Capt. Allan Elkins.
  Updyke was punched in the head, and believes there was more than one person involved, but didn't see who did it, Elkins said. The gas station did not have surveillance video.
  Updyke was treated for small bruises and scratches at a hospital, Elkins said.
Whoever is responsible could face misdemeanor charges, but there were apparently no witnesses.

We wrote about this back when the story came out in February, and  we knew there would be some country justice for 'ole Harvey Updyke Jr. I actually figured it would end in something bloodier than this. But this was decent I guess. I'm picturing a couple of modern age Dukes of Hazard teenagers spotting this asshole at the gas station and jumping out of their windows to attack this guy. A couple quick southern haymakers to the head, and back into their General Lee, which these days is probably a Ford S-350.
   And I'm gonna go out on a limb and say this won't be the last time he gets jumped either. You don't just kill 100 year old iconic trees and expect to get away with it. Not in the South, and certainly not in Auburn, AL.

But having said that.........Roll Damn Tide.


PS- It bothers me that Updyke doesn't have a middle name. I mean every other red neck in the news goes by their full name. Having two names as a first name helps me distinguish the West Virginia hicks from the Mississippi/Alabama hicks. Give me a Harvey Lee or a Harvey James for God's sake.